One of my list challenge is try to do online dating.
Honestly, I never pictured myself as someone who use online dating, respect to those who are use it, but personally I don't think online dating make sense. you meet someone online, chat, getting closer and then what? you don't know if they are real or not. even if you do meet up, going on dates, how sure are you about them? for me, it's more make sense when people use dating app to find sex buddy rather than to find someone who can (seriously) dating them or even more, to get into relationship. so, I decided to give it a try, to know how it works, how it feels and trying to understand why people use it.
My friend and I decided to try badoo and tinder for at least three months. we both never try this before and how to use it, so it takes about a month and half for us to finally know how to use it properly. January will be the third month, and our indicator is who's more popular. We count everything, who gets more likes, most reply messages and all that stuffs. cliché, I know, but that's just how our friends work sometimes. with a little bit (maybe lots) of useless competition.
anyway, after I made account, I abandoned it almost for a month (because I don't get it how to use it and it make me got headache anyway), only after few months passed and I got some spare time in my hands, then I got active in both dating app. I learned to say hi, make small talk to strangers, make conversation, then I realized something. the more active you in that app, the more popularity you have, which increases your chances to get some good recommendation from the app.
To my surprise, there are some decent guys there.
Either they want to make friends, to use their spare time, try their luck, or just want to find somebody to talk. of course there are those guys who only wants to fuck and looking for partner to have sex, most of them actually. I guess that's inevitable, and probably the most function of dating app. Don't get me wrong, but I mean, who use dating app with intention to date? with some strangers you don't know, in this digital era, when everything can be fake? come on. I don't judge people who does, like I said, there are some decent guys there, but when i think logically, that's the one that pops up.
After few months of using it, I got a lot of spams from those people who can't handle the rejection very well. so, we decided to end the challenge, counts the likes and everything and deleted our accounts.
here are some tips for you who wants to try dating app:
1. Always remember that any kind of information can be faked.
either you only want to try, or to have fun, or maybe serious looking for a date, you have to remember this. there is nothing wrong with double check everything and to make sure he is not psychopath or a serial killer. i'm not talking about the photos or profile info, any information they say about them can be a lie. remember that before you spilled any information about yourself.
2. Be careful, it's online.
a guy I met online told me, ".. you can do almost everything. sexting, videos, phone calls, but one thing for sure, you cannot showing your face. you don't know what they might do with all those stuffs you do, with your face in it." it is true. dating app, make us possible to do all of those thing with strangers, but still, no matter how nice they are, how close we get, they are still stranger. unless you already know them and knows that they're real.
3. if you want to have fun, this is the perfect place.
either you looking for one night stand, or sex buddy, or someone with no string attached, dating app is the perfect place. you don't need to make good rapport, or pep talk, there are some people who use this app for that reason as well. so, what you need to do just show your intention and ask them. for those who are wondering, no, this dating app is not like prostitute app or whatsoever, people who use this to find sex partner who are wants to do willingly. it is controversial here, in Indonesia, but most of user knows what they are doing.
