"why? why now? why he has to leave me now? when i just decided to accept him in my life because i cant ignored him anymore. why now?" i asked with trembling voice. "because god knows that if he take him sooner, you are not strong enough, like now. maybe god knows, that you it will broke you." my bestfriend says.
that was what I have been asking when the time finally comes, and he left from my life.
come to think of it, we don't really have a choice, about those who stays and those who left in our life's. we don't get to chose who will get our heart, who will break it, or who touched it. people come and go as our life goes, and some of them will left some print behind. they come into our life, some come with knocking, some come uninvited, some need an invitation, and some just... fit seamlessly.
personally, I'd like to think that it's a part of life surprises. plot twist of life. some will help you, break you, or just stay a little bit to teach you lessons. but if I have to be honest, it sucks.
lets say, I meet someone. it doesn't have to be a guy, or romantically, or a soulmate, they can be anyone, or maybe a friend. we talk, get to know each other, get close, and suddenly they left. for me, who always get attached too soon, love a little bit too much, and too often be the last one standing, it's awfully sucks when they suddenly left. usually, they left emotional big mess after that.
what's the point, then?
open up our hearts, let new people come into our lives, meet someone new, find new friends, what is the point of all that? why we have to face all of that, when eventually, they will left? it's time consuming, emotionally exhausting, and some people will fucked up your mind and your heart. are they worth the risk, tho?
but then again, if you never try, you will never know. you will never know what characteristic that can annoyed you so much, you can't tolerate it. you will never know which someone who are really special and who are unique. you will never know what kind of friends you do need, if you haven't meet the wrong ones. you will never know what kind of a man you want.
so, I guess everything did happen for a reasons.
every heartbreak.
every person we meet along the way.
every bad relationships.
every good reationships.
maybe everyone worth to try, but not everyone woth the risk.
